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The Sweetness of Married Life

Discussion in 'Comedy & Humor' started by Dennis, Jun 12, 2007.

  1. Dennis

    Dennis R.I.P.

    The Sweetness of Married Life
    > >
    > > A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although
    >
    > > very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with
    > > his old buddies.
    > >
    > > So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
    > >
    > > "Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
    > >
    > > "I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face," he answered. I'm going to have a
    >
    > > beer."
    > >
    > > The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the
    >
    > > refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12
    >
    > > different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
    > >
    > > The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could
    > > think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know...
    > > they have frozen glasses... "
    > >
    > > He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him
    >
    > > by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge
    > > beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills
    >just holding it.
    > >
    > > The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the
    > > bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I
    > > won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
    > >
    > > "You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took
    >
    > > out
    > > 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets,
    >
    > > mushroom caps and little quiches.
    > >
    > > "But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's swearing, dirty
    >
    > > words and all that..."
    > >
    > > "You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT! SIT YOUR
    > > ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT
    >
    > > YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED
    > > BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?" and...they lived happily
    > > ever after. Isn't that a sweet story? - MAKES MY EYES TEAR UP, SUCH A
    >HAPPY ENDING !
    > >